i think my mom watched the whole time
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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