He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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