It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
