He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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