can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
