Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
