where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
This is not my ceiling
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
