If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize