I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
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i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
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Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Pants are for mortals
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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