Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
I did not marry a roomba.
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