so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
