I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
