What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize