Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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