What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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