is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
