Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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