I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
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You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
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Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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