it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Quick, to the slutcave!
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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