Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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