So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I feel like a drive thru vagina
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
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