cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
I'm really busy with my period
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