We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Randomize
