i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
