i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
i now understand why vodka
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize