I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
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