I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
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his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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