Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Randomize
