i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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