the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
