You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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