hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
