his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Randomize