hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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