I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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