I like my sex mixed with concussions.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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