You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
