I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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