"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
