yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
