also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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