I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
