we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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