She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize