Porn is love you can see.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize