VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Randomize
