It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
