i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
