Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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