kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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