I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
